Last night on the news the topic of the tough economy came up. Shocker, right? We’ve all heard this before. Blah, blah, blah. However, the talk then turned to coupons and how there has been a rise in the use of coupons. Totally not surprising at all. As someone that occasionally uses Groupon and Living Social, I am always looking to save some dough on great restaurants and fun activities to do. Then the reporter went on the street asking people that if they went on a date with someone and the date used a Groupon or Living Social, would that be a dating dealbreaker? Most people seemed to say it was a definite no-no on a first date, but not a total dealbreaker a few dates in. Of course my brain started churning and I began thinking if I went on a first date with a guy and he whipped out a Groupon, would that be a dealbreaker for me. Hmmmm… I think on first date I’d be a little shocked actually, but I can’t quite say if I’d call it all off because of that. And for someone as picky as myself, I actually surprised myself after really thinking about it. In fact, I kind of find it ballsy for a guy to do that. Well ballsy and a little cheap. But after a few dates, yeah, buy a cool Groupon and let’s do something fun together. But I’m just gonna go ahead and advise you to hide that sucker on the first date.
So, would that be a dealbreaker for you? Do you have a list of set dealbreakers that have you saying “absolutely not”after a date? I know I have quite a few. There’s not enough room on this blog to list my guy dealbreakers (I kid, I kid), but here is what I consider to be some dating dealbreakers.
1) Being excessively late, especially without calling or texting. Not. Cool. I am a stickler for time and I get really irritable when people are late. Anything more than twenty minutes is just plain rude. I understand in NYC public transportation can be delayed and there can be horrible traffic and that is out of your control, but holler when you are off the train to let me know your deal. If you are late and I don’t get a call or text, that’s just not okay. It’s general common courtesy that if someone is waiting around for you, let them know where you are at and when they should expect you.
2) Texting or constantly checking your phone during the date. Can you say RUDE? What is so important that you have to keep checking? Is it the score of the game? Are you waiting for a better offer for later? What’s the deal dude? Are you that important that it can’t wait until I run to the bathroom or something? This is so not okay. Unless he has told you he is expecting an important call/text, the phone shouldn’t be out at all. Same goes for you too.
3) Not offering to pay for the drinks and/or meal. I know its 2013 and I am an independent woman, but there are just somethings that I can be old fashioned about and this is one of them. I really think the guy should pay for the first date or two. I always do the fake-to-grab-my-wallet thing when the bill comes, but I always assume the guy will stop me.
4) If he is rude to the waitstaff. Ugh. I feel you can tell a lot about a person by how they treat the staff in the restaurant. Please and thank you go a long way in my book as does a pleasant tone and polite manner toward those serving you. There is nothing worse than a rude, ungrateful patron and being seated and associated with one can be mortifying.
Honorable mentions: Namedropping/bragging. Drug use or getting hammered. Blabbering about an ex.
Luckily I have not experienced all of these. However, I have heard some truly “did that really happen?” stories from friends who some of these have happened to. Some who have had multiple dealbreakers happen by one dude on one date. Of course those dates sucked, but after the shock wore off, we all shared a laugh about him behind his back. Obvs. Sure a shitty date with an even shittier dude is brutal and is bad for dating morale, but hey, at least you get a funny story out of it. Although having to go on a date and experience any one of these sucks donkey balls, we must remember to keep on keeping on. There are plenty of good guys out there still and our time will come.