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Jay-Z and Beyonce sitting in the front row at the Toronto Raptors vs. Brooklyn Nets at the Barclays Center

So I was having drinks a few nights ago with a few friends, some single and some in relationships, when up popped the topic of cell phone privacy when in a relationship.  Of the 7 or 8 people in the discussion, the amazing thing was that there were no clear alignments based on gender or relationship status.  Fact is, there seemed to just be two lines of thought that people chose to side with regardless of other factors:

 “My phone is private, you have no reason to need to go through it.”  Vs.

 “If you’ve got nothing to hide, then why are you so protective of it”

As I sat back and listened to all of this, I began to think about how things were when I was a kid.  I don’t know about you, but there was 1 phone in the house and it was in the kitchen.  If you were going to get a call, then everyone was going to know your business.  (By the way, this made talking to girls as a teenager the most awkward thing ever as my mom was literally 10 feet away).  Anyway, going back to the larger issue, the fact is that people some how survived centuries without privacy for phone calls, with letters coming straight to the house and not to password protected email accounts, and without even the existence of text messaging.  The only time you needed privacy was when you didn’t want someone to know what you were up to (like when I’d be on the phone with my friends trying to organize cutting school to go to the Yankee’s home opener).  However, the fact remains, if I wasn’t up to something (or talking to a girl), it really wasn’t a big deal to have my privacy violated.

Going back to this original topic of cell phone privacy with regards to relationships, it amazes me that there is really any discussion on this topic at all.  Fact is, if you’re in a serious relationship and your phone is locked to keep your significant other out of it then you’re probably doing something wrong.  You may not be cheating, but you’re definitely doing things and saying things, that your bf/gf would be pissed about.  If you’re not fucking around, then what are you hiding?  Don’t give me the, “it’s just my phone” bullshit rebuttal.  Fact is, if someone goes through your phone a few times at random and nothing incriminating pops up they will slowly stop going through your phone.  If they don’t, then they are super insecure and/or crazy and you should break that shit off regardless.

Woman with mobile phone

Personally, my phone is never locked for the purposes of hiding stuff.  When I’m single, I couldn’t care less if a girl pulls the “let me look at his phone while he’s in the shower” move.  Why?  Because I’m single and if she wants to see that I’m talking to other girls, it may hurt her feelings but I’m not doing anything wrong.  It’s like blaming the sun for hurting your eyes when you look at it.  Don’t want to see something then don’t look, but I’m not in trouble because I haven’t done anything wrong.

When I’m in a relationship I couldn’t care less if my girlfriend pulls the, “I think he’s asleep let me go check his phone while it’s charging” move either.  Why?  Because I’m not cheating or talking to other girls.  Now in either case she may find a message between me and my boys talking about how annoying she is to watch sports with or how I really need to find a way out of going to see that “insert bad vampire title” movie; but it’s nothing that I can’t joke my way out of.  Why am I this way?  Because I’m honest and have nothing to hide.

I’m telling you, get over your fake entitlement to privacy, and if you’re in a real relationship then stop putting password locks on your life.  I promise you, it takes a huge weight off your shoulders, and also dramatically limits the likelihood of your phone accidentally falling in the water when you’re showering because you had to bring it in the bathroom to hide it from your gf/bf.

Oh, but one more thing before I go, if you’re going to keep half naked pics of other people you’ve dated on your phone, well those will always get you in trouble.  So I recommend “Private Calculator” to store them.  Seriously, it’s amazing.  Check it out.  But other than that, I swear, it’s way better to just be open and honest.

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